First, some housekeeping from the comments last week. Yes, I think it makes a lot of sense to make anybody who rolls a zero on a moneyball do 20 push-ups. Only logical. And I’ll take it one step further: if you roll a zero for the moneyball, you should have to do your pushups facing down the lane so everybody in the bar knows how badly you just screwed up. I want Billy the bartender saying “Wow, that loser just gutterballed it on the moneyball? Weak.”
Second, yes, an around the world would be a 0, 10, 20, 30, 40, 50, left hundo, right hundo in that order in one frame. Why would you do that in a league match? Because you’re a hero.
Third, wow, you guys are really bad at coming up with nicknames. DaVinskee is pretty good, but without context I can’t crown our friend Derek with that one. Derek Skeeter would be pretty good if the namesake wasn’t the antichrist. I can’t saddle Derek with that. And those of you who suggested Captain after I specifically said not to should be ashamed. So, by default, Derek is officially “Beers” Morgan. As The Baker points out, “he enjoys beer, has an English accent, and his own talk show.” I see no holes here. Welcome to the nickname club Beers.
Going forward, I’m going to have to take this nickname thing into my own hands. The joke is on you guys though, because I’m just as bad at nicknames as you are. Each week I’m going to present a target and four nickname choices and ask our fearless leader to set up a Facebook poll. This week’s target is Mr. Full Fifty himself, Steve Robinson. Your choices:
The Boston Terrier
See? These are horrible nicknames. Maybe next time you’ll take your job a little more skeeriously.
Now, onto the action on the lanes. I’m tired of talking about our veterans, so this week it’s all about the rookskees. Here are your top ten through three weeks. I included a fun fact about each of our top new rollers. I’ve met a few of these guys and am really impressed with their game and skee spirit, but to keep my anonymity these facts may or may not be totally made up. Enjoy:
Jenn “The Shed” Foxon: 355 (Jenn rode the unicycle in high school but later gave it up to pursue her passion with a career in fencing. It didn’t go well.)
Eric, of Chuck Noriskee: 343 (Eric was recently kicked out of his role as president of the Golden Girls fan club. Don’t ask why.)
Dave, of Ponzi Skeem: 340 (Dave fell and he couldn’t get up! Well, he eventually did, but for a few seconds there it wasn’t looking good. Good thing for Life Alert.)
Courtney Smith: 331 (Courtney is related to economist Adam Smith, Bubba Smith from the Police Academy movies, and Agent Smith from the Matrix. None are currently speaking with her.)
Lisa Ogawa: 326 (Lisa was born in Belgium. Or the Netherlands. I don’t know, I always get those two confused. Which one is the pot one?)
Anitra of Like a Skee 6: 321 (Anitra can’t start her day without watching at least two episodes of Saved by the Bell. I’m so excited! I’m so excited! I’m so…scared!)
Yiannis Ifantides: 318 (Yiannis holds several Dance Dance Revolution world records. Don’t step, you’ll get served.)
Eric Camfield: 309 (Eric is not actually a rookskee, but legally changed his name to again be eligible for rookskee of the year. That’s commitment.)
Theo, of Chuck Noriskee: 307 (Theo won the 2002 $2,500 No-Limit Deuce-to-Seven-Draw Tournament at the World Series of Poker in Vegas. So, yeah…he’s pretty good at poker.)
Chris Sykes: 295 (Chris had a short-lived hip-hop career under the pseudonym Skeeronimo. I don’t think he was very good because Google seems to know nothing about this.)
That’s it this week, skee you guys on the lanes in week 4!