Sigh.
It pains me to even write this blog. After 2+ years and countless nights in bars, in random apartments/houses, and through hundreds of skeeball matches, my favorite shorts have finally decided to head up to shorts heaven.
These shorts were like my best friend. They always put a smile on my face when I needed it, they had huge pockets that could carry everything from my phone to keys to pens to business cards to a digital camera to mints to skeeball trading cards. They were comfortable. If you crossed your eyes and let the plaid pattern overlap unto itself, a huge smiley face would pop out at you (go ahead and try it). They made people look and say “Man, look at those shorts….I bet that guy has a ton of fun!” They’ve traveled through countless states, been in numerous bar fights, have participated in countless full frontal hugs, and have seen the sun rise more times than set.
It’s a sad day indeed, but we all knew the time was eventually coming. And no one can say these shorts didn’t live a full life. Poor guy had beer stains, blood stains and a decent size hole on the right side. The final nail in the coffin though was a mysterious rip that showed up horizontally across the left side and just kept getting bigger.
So let’s all raise a glass for the plaid shorts — good luck in the afterlife….you’ll truly be missed!
Viewing and final goodbyes for the shorts will be held at Lucky B’s in Raleigh, this Thursday from 6:30 to 11:30. The family asks that in lieu of flowers or gifts, you simply show up and have the time of your life….just like the shorts would have wanted.
Take it away Puffy….
