ON THE RECORD w/ Gatskee — Week 1

Skeeson XII (12) [twelve] officially kicks off this evening and so begins another skeeson of ramblings from yours truly, The Great Gatskee. This skeeson will be a little bit different as I wish to present you all with sporadic interviews of random people related to skeeball. I can’t promise said interviews will be on the level of a Barbara Rollters or Rollprah Winskee, but we are gonna have a little fun with them. Like Farrell’s sobriety, they won’t last very long, but I think it will be a lot of fun to bring back a bit of “Get to Know a Roller.” I’ll be interviewing rookskees, veterans, homeless wanderers, Scotty the Body’s mom (she’s at my house so often, I might as well, right?), and maybe even a bartender or two. Hell, I may just make up the questions AND the answers if I feel like it. My column, my rules. I’m pretty pumped for this skeeson after a nice break from all of the madness so let’s kick things off right.

This week was a little tricky in that I wanted to start off with an interesting roller. I’ll be honest, my first choice was supposed to be a skeemate (Mr. Pizza), but when he totally bailed on Wheeler and I, an executive decision had to be made to rethink things. Enter Wes Knapp. Here is a guy who played the first 2 skeesons and also pulled arguably the most significant upset in SkeeNation Raleigh history when his team, Ali Baba & the 40 Skeeves (#8 seed), took down the SkeeEO and his #1 seeded Pirates of the Carriskeean in the playoffs. Wes peaced out after the next skeeson when he moved to California, but he has since returned to Raleigh after finding out that West Coast skeeball is wack. This skeeson, Wes is rolling with a pair of rookskees under the moniker Ninja Skeez. He returns at a perfect time too because the level of league smack talk has been wavering ever since a short lived “Boo Man” experiment. Believe me that Wes is gonna bring all that back. So here we go, skeediots. More interviews will follow!

The Great Gatskee: Wes, thanks for being the debut interviewee here this skeeson. I’d like to introduce you just a tad and then get on with a few questions if you will.

Wes Knapp: Bring it on.

The Great Gatskee: First off, your historic upset back in Skeeson 1 is fresh in people’s minds now that you have returned after bailing about ten skeesons ago. Why the hell did you come back?

Wes Knapp: Some rookskees (or whatever we call them now) who are my teammates for this skeeson had contacted me out of the blue (not knowing that I had played before)…and since I’m all moved back from Cali, I thought this was a sign that I needed to return.

The Great Gatskee: A sign to return, indeed. Obviously things have changed since Skeeson 1… do you have any expectations for the skeeson?

Wes Knapp: I expect that people will be reminded that $h!t-talking IS a part of skeeball. Let’s face it… anyone can roll a 900 on these new machines… but can they do it with someone creatively taunting them? Will they be able to keep their composure? I have a feeling there will be some major upsets.

Nichole “Booner” has already experienced this playing against Scotty the Body and myself in my first night back at freeskee tournament…. Nichole just needed to roll a 20 on her last ball to knock us out of the tournament. A simple request for almost all skeeballers, especially someone of her skill level, however… it didn’t happen and she was eliminated from the competition. That’s all I have to say about that.

The Great Gatskee: “Anyone can roll a 900 on these machines.” Hear that Scotty the Body? How about you, CT? Scooter? Evan? Sorry, I’m getting off topic here. $h!t talking has made a comeback in recent skeesons, so I’m all for having to handle distractions. Is Nichole your main target? Do I smell a rivalry?

Wes Knapp: Nichole who? That’s already in the past and forgotten. I like a challenge.

The Great Gatskee: Let’s talk about your team a bit. Do your rookskees have any idea what they are in for?

Wes Knapp: Well I think they got a taste during freeskee: there are lots of dudes here who have no life and take skeeball ultra serious… I think you mentioned most of them earlier…ha. But in all seriousness, we are all really competitive guys, so it will be interesting to see how these rookskees respond to solid rolling while we get our bearings as a team….

The Great Gatskee: Are you disappointed that ~~Farrell~~ [ed's note: the experts] didn’t include your team in the pre-skeeson rankings?

Wes Knapp: Not at all… I’ve been out of play for a while and my two rookskees on my team are unknown. Plus, I think he’ll always hold a grudge for that skeeson 1 upset…

The Great Gatskee: I have heard rumors since that upset that Farrell may have “thrown” the match. He’s never admitted to it, but what do you think?

Wes Knapp: I remember seeing the tears in his eyes…. and they looked pretty real.

The Great Gatskee: He doesn’t play much anymore and I honestly think it is partially a fear of history repeating itself. Who do you think is the next “Farrell Upset Special” this skeeson?

Wes Knapp: Well Danielle isn’t playing, but I was really hoping to finally bring down CT and Danielle (like I should have in skeeson 1). I really don’t know many of the people this skeeson (other than people who’ve been around since skeesons 1 and 2)… so I’m not quite sure yet, but I’ll be at Isaac Hunters stalking for those weak limping gazelles.

The Great Gatskee: You are coming out guns blazing. It’s pretty obvious you will be one of the louder rollers this skeeson. Can you share any advice for the many rookskees playing for the 1st time?

Wes Knapp: It’s better to be consistent and practice what you want to get good at early on in the skeeson (whether it’s up the middle or hundos). People who have never hit a hundo, should NOT go for a hundo when you think the lead is slipping away during a match. Better to get a 30 or 40, than a 10!

The Great Gatskee: That’s sound advice, Wes. You took the 1st Free Skee tourney with Scotty the Body, so you are off to a good start this skeeson. I’m definitely looking forward to your heckling and seeing if you also walk the walk. Thanks for taking a little time to answer a few questions. Any last words before the skeeson officially begins?

Wes Knapp: All I have to say is: It’s already been broughten.

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